What I Wish the World Knew About Kids who Learn Differently

My first four years of teaching I taught in a fourth grade classroom.  

I loved it but boy was I CLUELESS.

Let us fast forward 17 years later. 

I’m still clueless.  

Let’s face it, the bar is always moving.

I have worked in daycare, general ed, self contained, inclusion, and resource K-8.  

I have two kids who are currently in school.  

As clueless as I am, I have learned a few things.  

I am passionate about those ‘few things’.  

If I had a magic genie this is what I wish everyone in the whole wide world understood about kids who learn differently. 

Kids who learn differently or identified as ‘at risk’…

1.  should be held with high expectations not unrealistic standards.

2.  have feelings of hopelessness, shame, and anxiety when they see yet another test they studied for but were unable to pass, starting as early as kindergarten.

3.  most always have strength in creative and athletic areas.

4.  need an intervention or repetition to access new skills.  The less time they have to master, the further behind they will get. 

5.  work just as hard as the AIG students beside them but have less to show for it.

6.  need MORE time to think, process, and write out answers.  Most of them are still thinking of question 1 by the time the instructor is on 3.

7.  resort to looking at someone else’s paper because they can’t keep up with the pace and don’t want to call attention to weakness.

8.  will face another student who says:  QUIT LOOKING AT MY PAPER You CHEATER or laugh at their 'bad' grade, leaving them feeling both defensive and secretly ashamed.

9.  will light up like a Christmas tree when given something they CAN DO (not something you ‘think they can do’ or ‘should be able to do’ but can do).

10.  must be gradually taught how to accept challenges head on.  Challenges are good in increments. 

11.  are tired of hearing “you need to work harder”.

12.  are overwhelmed by doing more work they don’t know how to do at home .  They will most likely get yelled at by a parent or caretaker for not “understanding it”.   Thus why kids say “I don’t have homework”.

13.  take triple the time to finish an assignment at home because they forget and are tired under the best of circumstances.

14.  need to practice skills at home that are necessary but get sick at the thought of choosing between large amounts of school work and activities such as sports, play, or youth group because they feel “too stupid” to keep up.  

15.  have a deep desire to please the teacher like the “smart” kids are able to do.

16.  would give anything to be able to access information quickly like “other kids”.  

17.  will only build self confidence from meeting real and authentic goals (not a fake certificate), no matter HOW much their mom, dad, grandma tell them how smart and great they really are.

18.  throw in the towel by 5th and 6th grade if they are given little hope of success.  50% of the time behavior problems become  real issues and further down the road become at risk for self harm, addictive behaviors, dropping out, and/ or teen pregnancy. Approximately 80% of prison inmates are reported to be functionally illiterate.

19. make their parents cry.  There is always a story, there is always a grade, there is always an assignment, there is always “a comment” that makes a mom sneak to the bathroom and have a good cry because they desperately want their child to be 'ok' and secretly feel ‘it is their fault’. 

20.  need an advocate in every school building.  (An advocate can mean the difference in a parent/ child breathing a sigh of relief or crying themselves to sleep.)

This.  Matters.